No Regrets
by tinylexie
Summary: Zedd ponders the fact that without Darken Rahl there would be no Richard.


All I had wanted to do was help a close friend.I was young and foolish.

Held captive by the great wonders of my power,

I did not stop to think

Of the consequences of my actions.

I was full of arrogance back then.

I actually thought that I could do the work of the Creator.

The years have humbled me, Richard,

But sometimes I wish that I had been humbled 

Before I dared to play Creator.

By giving Panis Rahl the ability to conceive,

I allowed for the birth of Darken Rahl,

The greatest evil that the world has ever known.

During his lifetime, Darken Rahl destroyed many families.

His desire for power and his thirst for war 

Left behind many orphans and widows.

For those that survived,

They will always carry emotional, mental scars,

And it's all because Darken Rahl was allowed to exist.

I was the one who allowed Darken Rahl to exist.

Back when I was young and naïve, Richard,

I never thought that my arrogance

Would result in so much death and so much destruction.

You, dear Richard, are the only good thing

To come from my severe error in judgment.

Because I gave Panis Rahl the ability to conceive,

You were able to be born, Richard,

In order to one day defeat my mistake, Darken Rahl.

The Creator meant for you, the Seeker, 

To defeat the evil tyrant.

The Creator fixed what should have never

Had to be fixed in the first place,

But things are still not fixed.

Darken Rahl's death has only made things worse,

And it's all because of me and my arrogance.

Once again, Richard, the Creator meant for you

To be one to fix what should have never 

Had to fixed in the first place.

I sometimes wish, Richard, 

That I could go back in time

And deny Panis Rahl's request

To help him conceive an heir,

But as you said yourself, my dear boy,

If Darken Rahl had never been born,

You wouldn't have been born either;

And I now couldn't imagine a life without you.

You are my beloved grandson, Richard.

You are a shining beacon in the darkness

That I created.

I am just as cruel and wicked as Darken Rahl

To want to take back his birth

Because I can't take back his birth

Without taking back your birth as well, Richard.

As much as I wish that the evil tyrant never had to exist,

I also do not wish to lose the Seeker.

If only the evil tyrant had not had to exist

Before the Seeker could take his place in the world.

I am full of so many regrets, Richard,

But I do not regret you.

Even though Darken Rahl's existence

Ruined many innocent lives,

I could never regret you, Richard.

I feel guilty once again.

Should I not be willing to sacrifice you, my dear boy,

Just one life,

In order to save the lives of many others?

If Darken Rahl had never been born,

Many lives would have never been taken away,

But then I wouldn't have you either, Richard.

You may be just one life, my dear boy,

But you are the world to me.

Call me selfish, but wouldn't all grandfathers

Do whatever it took to protect the lives

Of their grandchildren?

I live in a tough dilemma.

I don't want innocents to die,

But I don't want you to die either, my beloved grandson.

I am so proud of you, Richard.

You are a better man than I was in my youth,

And I know that when you reach my current age,

You will be even wiser than I am now.

I can never escape from the fact

That I caused the death of many innocents,

But I would feel just as guilty 

If I was to wipe out your life, Richard.

I try to comfort myself with the fact, my dear boy,

That you are not only meant to exist

To defeat Darken Rahl.

You are meant to have a life beyond that demon.

Darken Rahl only exists to spread evil,

But you, Richard, are meant to be a great evil

That everyone can look up to

And strive to be like.

Sometimes innocents have to die

In order for something great to happen,

And I couldn't imagine a greater happening

Than your birth, Richard.

My beloved grandson, you are meant 

To make a big difference in this world.

Evil eventually fades from memory.

Darken Rahl's name will eventually be forgotten,

But people will tell stories of the Seeker's wonderful deeds

Long after his death,

And I know deep in my heart that those wonderful deeds

Won't be just about defeating evil.


End file.
